Saturday, January 22, 2011

...that make me wonder if some people are brain damaged.

So I had a visitor today. An old friend of mine who heard I was feeling a little worse for wear and thought she might come cheer me up. Of course, she came bearing bakery goodies that I couldn't eat without feeling like I was swallowing gravel so that sucked, but it was nice to have some company from someone who wasn't immediately repulsed by the fact that I look like the walking dead wearing a face mask.

Oddly enough, if you walk down the main street of a busy little country town shuffling your feet, with deathly pale skin that makes your eyes look sunken and wearing a face mask, you tend to attract some interesting looks. One lady even ushered her kids to the other side of the street when she saw me coming. Those are the sort of people I just want to cough all over.

We shared stories and memories about the good old days. She laughed, I attempted to laugh and ended up coughing into my mask. All in all, a good time was had. Until this happened..

She picked up a cream-filled pastry from the bakery bag, took a bite, exclaimed "Oh dude, this tastes like ass!" ... And then took another bite.


Now, maybe it's just me but, if something tastes like ass (which begs the question "You know what ass tastes like?!") wouldn't you ... Oh I dunno, maybe ... Throw it out!? 

No, my friend sat there and ate the whole thing! THE WHOLE THING! She complained the whole time about the taste and even tried to hand it over to me saying "Here, taste this. It's disgusting!" I felt like saying "Here, stick my shoe in your mouth. I stepped in dog poop earlier, it's disgusting!" Why would you offer me something that you think tastes like ass? Do I look like the sort of person who enjoys ass-flavour?!

"Do you have anything I can drink to get this taste out of my mouth?" She asked when she was finished.

"No. You wanted to finish the whole thing, now you can just sit there and put up with the ass taste in your mouth."

Harsh? Maybe. But it amazes me how some people have survived this long.

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